The corner, just above the door, unsettles me. I can’t move my eyes from it. Breathe, dummy. It’s just an entrance to the attic crawlspace. Just a three-foot by four-foot hole in the ceiling. You need a ladder to get to it. Nothing to worry about. The piece of plywood covering the hole is in the same spot it always is. Look at it. It’s even got the same paint and plaster pattern as the rest of the ceiling, just a few inches higher up is all. Just sitting there.
Shut off the light and go to sleep. The click is so loud on the lamp. There can’t even see it now. Nothing to see anyway. Nothing to see. Can’t see it. Close your eyes, stop staring in the dark. Can’t see it.
Turn over. There. Can’t see it. It’s dark in here anyway. Close my eyes. I can see it now. Eyes closed facing the wall, I see the attic entrance. Count some sheep. One, two, three… Did it move? I heard something. No. Just imagined it. Can’t sleep. Maybe read something. I know, turn on the TV.
Turn over. I can’t see it. Facing it. Too dark. Where’s the remote? Turn on the TV find something to grab my attention. The light flickering, did it move? Just the flicker right? No, it’s definitely not where it was. Where the lamp switch.
I can see it. It moved. I’m getting up. Investigate. No its still closed. Back to bed go to sleep. Lay down, shut off the lamp and watch tv till I fall asleep. I can see it. Can’t tell but it looks like it moved. It moved. It moved. Can’t stop watching. The shadows. They’re getting darker. So cold. It burns. So dark. I can’t see it.