Why is this so trying? Waiting and holding. Excited, nervous, hopeful, and nauseatingly anticipating a response from an agent is the hardest thing for me to deal with. While I’m confident that my manuscript is worthy of publishing, this process has been a confidence challenging journey. With a full request sent out, the waiting starts, waiting again.
The bottle of Amontillado waits in my pantry, in a dark corner, ready to breathe in the light. It waits to be poured out, to share its bouquet, to be consumed, and enjoyed. It’s waiting again with me until the waiting is over.
My characters, they mean everything to me, are waiting to live. They are waiting to scare, to thrill, to inspire, to share themselves with the world. Waiting to have likeness come to fullness in the imagination of eager minds. Waiting to see their world bloom in a young mind. They are waiting again.
I know that finding an agent doesn’t end the journey to publication but that’s the largest of all the milestones. Once one of these gatekeepers opens the entrance to the traditional publishing kingdom, you are that much closer to realizing something we all dream of.
So this landmark is huge, and I’m willing to do whatever needed to get my book published. Sleepless nights, gutting, reworking, renaming, promoting, whatever it takes. I’m waiting again for that opportunity. I’m working for that opportunity. I’m waiting again with hope, trepidation, and hope again.